Normal P*rn For Normal People


Death Head
Feb 7, 2017
Pine Bluff, Arkansas
So y'all know what a Creepypasta is, right? It's basically a short Internet story told from a first-person perspective that is meant to shock, scare or disturb. It actually serves more as an urban legend repackaged and retold for the Internet age, than a fictional book. The more realistic, the better. Now mind you, it's pretty much all just fiction -- but many Creepypastas are rooted (to some form or another) in reality, when compared to traditional urban legends. Which is what makes them so damn good.

Well, there is one Creepypasta that takes realism to a whole new extreme. Some of you may be aware of it, and may have even mistaken it for the real deal. "Normal Porn For Normal People". It centers around a mysterious website that is, and I'm quoting, "dedicated to the eradication of abnormal human sexuality". The website contains a series of surreal, David Lynchian videos that look like edgy art projects but keep on getting more sinister and sinister. Until' the last video, titled "Useless.Avi", which shows a blonde woman restrained and strapped to a bed, only to be attacked and mauled to death by a chimpanzee that's been fully shaved and painted red from head to toe. Yep--you read that right.

This is the Creepypasta told in its entirety:
It was written sometime around 2008 or 2009, and went viral; some were even convinced that there was a shitload of truth to it. Even though there never was any hard evidence that the website even existed. A few years after the "story" made rounds online, a website was created and modeled partially after NormalPornForNormalPeople, as described in the story. And low and behold, the infamous "Useless.avi" video....... wasn't there. But someone did go out of his/her way to reenact Shack.Avi and, wellllll, ummm...... just take a look.

If there is just ONE thing that makes me wonder, that there may be some grain of truth to the story, it's this quote from some anonymous coward on 4chan's /x/ (paranormal) board: "it's real, but not made by those fags at normalpornfornormalpeople. actual footage was made somewhere in east asia, thailand or phillipines i'm not sure. there was a brothel where this monkey was used as a sex slave and 'actress' in multiple movies including this footage. the monkey was eventualy rescued after police raid on that place but there's not much coverage on the whole situation. sick shit".

Now, I know what you're thinking: just hearsay from an AC on 4chan, anonymous cowards live to pull shit out of their asses and 4chan is basically the armpit of the Internet anyways, right? Right. And I'm still EXTREMELY hard-pressed to believe him. But, then there's this: the mauling victim, as described in the indisputably fake story version of the video, was Caucasian with blonde hair. And yet, the /x/ poster alleges it was INSPIRED by a case from THAILAND. Do a quick Google search on "Useless.avi", the only image I could pull up was an Asian-looking lady (NOT a Caucasian Blonde) being restrained and handcuffed on what looks like a pull-out bed, as a masked man and a monkey walk in. Which is probably just a screenshot from a re-enactment video that's been taken down. But if I were to play Devil's advocate and argue that the Creepypasta is partially true, I would use that.