my cuts and stitches from December 5th

deaddog

Deathling
Feb 11, 2016
62
68
18
45 stitches total, not because of severity, just shitty location.

spent all night in the er and managed to avoid psych ward.

i got to take the stitches out myself after a weekish and that was really fun. should have taken a video about it.
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ECFF9EE5-8C0A-4B59-9995-4E618B31EF0F.jpeg
 

deaddog

Deathling
Feb 11, 2016
62
68
18
i must be reallly fucked because my mental health worker finally gave me my apartment keys back and i have to overwhelming urge to cut again. I know if i do they'll court order me back to supervised living. its been two weeks and i have a wicked mad craving lmao

i dont really want to stop
 

Woden

Death Head
Nov 18, 2016
798
1,749
18
45 stitches total, not because of severity, just shitty location.

spent all night in the er and managed to avoid psych ward.

i got to take the stitches out myself after a weekish and that was really fun. should have taken a video about it.
I do not mean to sound insensitive and I will not issue any judgement, assessment or opinion. I am sure you have your reasons and frustrations for mutilation. New hobby perhaps? I use to go on rages and destroy...then I found the delights of pussy and made it my game to seduce as many as possible, turning it into even an art. I had a blast and a lot of new memories.
 

deaddog

Deathling
Feb 11, 2016
62
68
18
I do not mean to sound insensitive and I will not issue any judgement, assessment or opinion. I am sure you have your reasons and frustrations for mutilation. New hobby perhaps? I use to go on rages and destroy...then I found the delights of pussy and made it my game to seduce as many as possible, turning it into even an art. I had a blast and a lot of new memories.

eh, 5 years is a long time for a habit. ive had lots of hobbies and obsessions and such. self harm is the thing that gets
me hurt the least. like when i let people give me money and beat me up. that was good but i got bored and someone broke my glasses.
 

deaddog

Deathling
Feb 11, 2016
62
68
18
what pleasure do you get from doing this to yourself ?
chills out my anxiety, man. helps me get in a mindset where i cant think about my issues. I really like the blood, too.
 

m4dd3d

Deathling
Dec 14, 2016
36
35
6
Man go get dogs, or cats. An animal helps 100 times more than anything else, if you like animals of course. I used to cut myself too, i talk from experience. Or instead of paying people too beat you up. Start to train and beat up someone instead. Visualize that the person you are kicking in the head is yourself. I have trained muay thai and tae kwon do for alot of years. Believe me, it helps. And if that just sounds like bullshit, well atleast try cut so that youl livv live to tell the tale and dont have to pay a visit to the er.
 

HillaryClinton

Deathling
Dec 12, 2016
80
44
0
So when u say u would get paid to get beaten up... Do u mean veing a submissive? Have u thought of working for an s&m club? Or some sort of exotic company? Maybe the controlled pain would be healthier. Cutting is so destructive, and im guessing its a control thing and the release of tension from the pain so flip it to something healthier?
 

Miss Suicide

Drawing Blood
Nov 11, 2016
236
502
63
I also speak from experience, and even though I still do it from time to time, I just want to say, it's better if you stop. I know how hard it is, but in the end it's so much better for yourself if you quit doing it. And imo you shouldn't avoid psychiatric help, you should be glad someone is taking their time into trying to help you. If I was in your situation, I would be thankful for all the help I could get.
I'm not judging or anything, and I know that hurting yourself relieves whatever pain you're going through, but in the end, it will only bring you misery.. Please take good care of yourself.
 

Trash

can!
Aug 2, 2016
320
595
16
ohio
I know directly that you didn't make this thread so you would have people nag you with possible better life decisions but that's what you got haha. Cutting is one of the most ruthless ways you can turn your pressure relief valve... and you know better than me that your just running away from whatever real underlying issue you're really dealing with. I'm all too aware of that lustful obsession with blood...
 
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